The Cost of Leadership: Sacrifice of Trust

The series we are in has been about the “cost” to you for being a leader in today’s healthcare. We have looked at the change in peer relationships, humbling of your pride for the good of your leadership, a change in perspective and its impact on your thinking and we will finish in our next blog, our last for now, on the cost of leadership. These cost sometimes become obvious, other cost become known because great leaders have mentored about the price of being a leader, and some like today’s topic you learn from experience. The sacrifice of trust is a cost that at times, may be too high to pay.

A leader in a healthcare organization, for which he worked for over 20 years, found himself reaching senior executive positions. Included in many of the top level discussions about the organization, personnel selections, and impact in the direction of the organization, this leader was doing what he thought was need to ensure the success of the organization and the staff working in the organization. By all accounts, it was a winning combination.

It soon became apparent to this leader the top executives were making decisions about him, his future, and not being transparent about their thoughts or actions. The leader was engaged in discussions about future positions, the opportunity to serve where needed, and had many positive discussions with some top leaders. In considering the actions of the top leader, this leader considered why they were not discussing his future in an open and respectful manner. He thought it could be the top leaders were not being honest about their plans because or that there were no deliberate plans, they didn’t have enough leadership courage to share the honest and compassionate truth to this leader, or they were just plain being manipulative with the future of this leader in the organization. Has this happened to you at any level?

How did it make you feel? How would you feel if this were you?

The leadership and decision dynamics of an organization are multifaceted and most times, ever changing. As you may have experienced, decisions made may need to be reversed because of new or more accurate information has become known. With personnel issues, you are dealing with individuals with a free will and in that, change is constant. How moves occur or promotions are handed out have many factors impacting decisions which can implode as soon as they are made. How the leader handles these challenges speaks to their character and leadership philosophy. It’s not easy.

Dealing with followers causes leaders a large percentage of their stress. Great leaders understand their actions, good and bad, have impacts on the followers. Good actions can backfire and there are some surprisingly positive outcomes from bad decisions. Leaders should work to take care of the mission of their organization and support the followers. It’s a basic concept in leadership. Yet many leaders when it comes to personnel issues have little professional or personal skill sets to handle the situation. Many are just ignorant on how to be better.

Still, some leaders are conniving, lack integrity in their actions, or truly play a political game for their advantage. Likewise, some leaders don’t have the courage or ability to be transparent with their followers for fear of rejection, losing their perceived status as a leader, or being considered a weak leader so they roll on at the expense of their followers.

How would you feel if this were you?

The question of how you would feel is appropriate. Oh, I know the hard tough business leaders will tell you that your “feelings” are inconsequential to the discussion of your leadership and your employment. I would say to you, they are wrong. When you work for an organization, the “whole” of you works for the organization. If you are of substance and quality, then you bring your whole self to work every day and you work for professional growth, status, the betterment of the organization, and meeting the mission. You invest yourself into the fabric of the culture, you support the direction of the organization, and you work to change things you believe are wrong or not in the best interest of the mission or the people. That is what leaders do!

As a leader, you expect the same of your leaders.

But…there are times when all you have done comes to the pinnacle that might end in the sacrifice of your trust in the organization or a leader. This happens when you feel you have been treated unfairly, take advantage of, or with a lack of respect. If you have believed in and supported the organization, been an active and engaged member, when you feel that same commitment has not be met or violated, then your trust has been sacrificed. And let me say, it will happen, and in some organizations, many times.

Why? Because we are still dealing with humans in broken systems and in broken organizations and leaders who are overworked. The fast moving pace of healthcare does not always allow for perfect decision or for leaders to get it right every time. The volatile daily work at times overruns the best of leaders and they don’t get the opportunity to do all they can, or what they know they want or should do. And some leaders are just not as connected to their people and have no clue how they are perceived. I’m guilty of all of these at times. You?

So, now what do you do when you find yourself in this position as this leader found himself? The options before you are many, and the clear emphatic piece of advice I can share is…do not do anything in the immediate aftermath after you have paid this price of leadership. As sage and as simple as this sounds, never make a response when you are operating in the emotional state. The feelings you have will swing from anger, to defeat, to frustration, to betrayal and everything in between. No good can come from reacting during this time.

I’d like to provide you some recommendations on what you can do when you believe you have loss the trust in your organization or leader. Every situation is different, but theses 4 things can help you find your footing and give you a chance to make future plans:

1. Take Time: Take time for you. As mentioned, your feelings will be all over the place. I always share with colleagues that when you face a disappointment, failure, or loss of trust, take some time to process or think through the situation and come to peace with it. Sounds easy…really it isn’t. You need to take time to grieve, to objectively assess the situation, and consider alternatives. This time is valuable to moving on and several of the following steps.
2. Forgive: Oh, now I said it. Yes, you need to come to the place where you forgive the leader or the organization. This doesn’t have to be conversation, though it could be. This forgiveness is about you. It is about you realizing there are probably forces you are not aware of that caused this violation of trust. You have put it on a leader or the organization, which is natural. As you took time to ponder the situation, sometimes you become aware of other reasons why this happened. Those reasons may make you feel better or worse. Regardless, for you to move on and not give way to bitterness and negativity, you need to forgive the “offender”.
3. Move On: After forgiveness comes some action. At this point, you need to find your new place in this organization, or in another. Yes, moving on can be remaining in the same organization or finding a new one. Neither should be done lightly, but you have options. Moving on also means you have your “Elsa moment” and Let It Go! You no longer focus on the breach of trust and relive it at every opportunity. Professionally, it becomes a sign of a weak leader; personally it makes you miserable. Neither of these traits make you an attractive or effective leader.
4. Purpose: A wonderful gift about this cost of leadership is you have a fantastic chance to discover, refine, or renew your purpose for being a leader. Every opportunity provides you a chance to grow, even a negative one. Never miss that chance to grow. You owe it to yourself and your future followers to learn something about the situation. The situation as you have moved through these stages may have provided information about your perception of the events or how circumstances forced changes in what you believed were plans made. The events never seem to be simple cause and effect actions. You should discover over time many variables played into the actions you experienced.

This can be a painful cost in leadership. Your perspective before and after an event like this should propel you to change some actions or insight on your leadership. Why, because we would not want to be the same type of leaders to do this to someone else! The amazing thing is, you are still the same person and what you do with this new growth is all up to you!

Leading with you,

Dean

It’s time to share with your colleagues and other great leaders!

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